Writing everyday?

It has been a few days since I made a contribution to this blog and while I definitely wish that I had not missed so many days in a row there have been so many things that have popped up in my personal life that have either kept me extremely busy or left me feeling drained by the end of the day.

First off, I had to make a trip down to Savannah, Georgia to be able to attend the very first birthday of my cousin’s son. Now many of you might think this is simply no big deal, but let me tell you this: out of the combined nine children between my father and his two brothers (two are in their mid thirties, the rest of us in the mid to late 20s) this is the ONLY grandchild produced thus far. Why? Not a clue. It’s just how it is. So naturally the entire family had to get together to celebrate the little guy.

Fast forward to Monday. I got a phone call after my fiance letting me know he had been in a car accident and yes, it was his fault. I was hit with so many emotions all at once. Fear for his safety and well being as well as intense rage that he had yet another accident (three total in the past 2 years). Spending the day in the hospital with him lessened the stress because, well, what’s done is done. There is no rewind button and you have to move forward.

Tuesday comes and insurance deems the car a total loss. Great. My Kia soul, a car that I ADORED, is gone. Haven’t even made the 8th payment on her yet. Crap. Call the dealership to get the information on the gap coverage policy that I requested FIVE TIMES before signing my papers on the vehicle. Guess what? They didn’t add the gap. Anyone reading this who has ever had a total loss will know how vital this insurance is. If you don’t have it, please go get it. It’s really stressful not to. So, thankfully I signed up for the extended 100,000 mile warranty that my dad begged me not to get because at the very least I now have another 2000 towards the cost of my car. This should in theory only leave us with about 2-3k we have to pay down. Luckily, vehicle lien holders will usually drop the price and interest on all payments moving forward due to such a small amount.

All of this coupled with a few more issues that came my way revolving around this accident (I don’t want to continue to give a long drawn out account of my week) has left me feeling drained at the end of most of my days. I have not had the time to sit down and write this blog nor have I had time to focus on putting any more effort into my novel.

Any aspiring writer would sympathize with me and know that when you don’t see yourself making progress on a project like a novel you tend to start questioning your passion and commitment to said project. Many writers even go out of their way to try and set the goal of writing SOMETHING every single day.

The fact of the matter is that you are bound to fail if you push yourself to that extreme and when you fail at your own goals the pressure can at times feel even heavier than it would have without the crazy strict goals. Sometimes you just don’t have time to write. Sometimes you are so emotionally drained that anything you actually do manage to write is simply going to be subpar, but you will know this and choose not to write. THIS IS OKAY.

Do not let yourself listen to the naysayers. Do not let yourself feel bad or less skilled as a writer simply because you find that you do not always have time. This will do nothing for your outlook or your project.

Don’t stress. You will get there. Eventually. Too many people don’t chase their dreams and passion because they feel they don’t have the time to do it. Do it anyway. At your own pace. Everyone is different. Even if it takes longer than you want it to, at least you have tried.

Resolutions…

I am a little behind in the game with getting my New Years post written, but honestly I was finding it a little hard to find words for what I wanted to say. I figured that if I just sat down to write this evening that what I wanted to say would simply come to me and as usual I am right… it seems that writer’s block can affect even what would seem like the simplest forms of verbal expression. 

So, it’s 2019. Not yet three days into the new year (as I currently write, anyhow) but the one thing I knew I could count on upon entering the new year was reading everyone’s proclamation of their New Year’s Resolutions. Don’t get me wrong, this is not a hate post. It really makes me happy to see so many people who have things in their lives that they truly want to spend some time working on as they move forward in life. Time is constantly moving so sometimes we all need an event like the start of another year to remind us to take the time to take care of ourselves.

The problem for me with this system is that any time I ever really try to make a resolution, even with the best intentions, I fail. I don’t just fail. I fail HARD. I sit here and reflect on some of the crap that has been handed to me over the past year (and further back) and I am seriously surprised I have even made it this far. Every single task I have ever tried to undertake has almost ALWAYS ended in failure. I have stumbled over most road blocks and I have not ever managed to land on my own two feet (without assistance). So…instead of trying to reflect on my past year and make some unattainable resolution…I want to focus on a lesson I have learned instead.

Change is not an option.

No matter what chapter of life we are in…something is going to change…whether we want it to or not. Change can happen in many different forms. Residences change. Jobs change. The faces you see on a daily basis change. Appearances change. Health changes. This is something that, especially to creatures of habit, can seem like the absolute end of the world. Unfortunately, the fact is that 90% of the time there is nothing that we can do to alter what does and does not change for us in our daily lives. Outside forces we almost never see coming impact these changes. We can’t stop it. We can only CHANGE how we react. That brings me to my REALISTIC resolution for this year.

RESOLUTION: Breathe.

Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

This is the only word I can allow myself to cling to. If I don’t, I will spend the next year of my life doing exactly what I have done over the course of the past five and that’s worrying and stressing over things that I cannot CHANGE. I have to stop and breathe before I react. Yes, the changes might be hard. Yes, the changes might break my heart. Yes, the changes could drain my bank account in a matter of minutes. The problem with worrying about those things… is what they do to your soul. Worrying sucks all of the happiness and wonder out of a life that is supposed to be as beautiful as it is amazing.

It is because of this… rather than making some crap resolution that I know I will ultimately fail at because, let’s face it, many resolutions fail… I want to make the promise to myself that I will try. All I want to do is try. I want to try to live my best life. I want to try to find a reason to smile everyday. I want to try to make each day count for something. And most importantly… I want to TRY to remember to not be so damn hard on myself. The rest will follow…right?

Book Review: Bird Box

Hello, everyone! If this is not your first time reading my blog, welcome back, and if it is, thank you for joining me! This is a follow up entry to a bit of a movie review that I wrote just last night that you can find here.

So, I made mention in my other post that before I knew that Bird Box had initially been a book written by Josh Malerman I watched the film adaptation of the story shortly after it was put out on Netflix. I thought the story was so compelling that I kind of wanted to put in the time and effort to get to know the characters better as well as better understand the type of world that they found themselves to be inhabiting. So, I made the promise of navigating to my Kindle app and purchasing the eBook, and I followed through. I was so taken in by this story I literally finished reading it in a matter of around 24 hours.

SPOILER ALERT!! IF YOU DON’T WANT A STORY YOU HAVE NOT READ RUINED FOR YOU, TURN BACK NOW!!

I mean it, guys. I am about to rip this thing open. If you have not read the book or watched the movie, follow the links and get it done! BOOK | MOVIE

Now, the movie was absolutely fantastic if you are into the whole post apocalyptic, horror, psychological thriller kind of thing. Honestly, I myself am not too intrigued by this prospect. That being said, as soon as all of my friends were discussing this film I knew I needed to watch it so that I could at the very least understand what was happening on my newsfeed on Facebook.

I wrote a short synopsis of the story in my first post about the film. To save time for those who haven’t read it or would rather not navigate to the page, here it is:

“Bird Box is a horror/psychological thriller in which main character Malorie finds herself thrust into an apocalyptic scenario that, quite frankly, I find to be absolutely terrifying. The story centers around an unseen force that is wiping people off the face of the earth (not literally) via means of suicide. Yeah, you read that right. Anyone who lays their eyes on whatever these creatures are is driven mad, or into sadness, and begin to take their own lives. Pretty quickly all characters learn that the only way to survive is to simply not look at the creatures. Problem is, they seem to be everywhere. Unless they are safely inside the abandoned house they inhabit where their windows are covered they must wear a blindfold at all times. Fast forward five years and pretty much everyone in their group is gone apart from Malorie and two children. The area they are staying in is no longer safe (no, I won’t tell you why because no one likes spoilers) and the time has come for them to move on. Malorie had previously gained knowledge of a possible sanctuary where they might be safe but the issue was getting there safely. Long story short, viewers find themselves observing Malorie and the children riding in a row boat down a river for days, blind folded. To top this off they are being stalked by various dangers.”

Now that we have that out of the way…let’s get to the real treasure here: THE BOOK. Usually when I come across movies that were created in the image of a book I find that the book is often better than its film adaptation. Bird Box was no different in this respect for me. That is absolutely not saying that I didn’t love the film, because I most certainly did. I just felt that the book told readers far more about the world and the troubles faced within than the movie was able to.

There are several key differences within the story. For instance: in the movie, one of the survivors that Malorie found herself living with for a short time (Tom) was pictured to have been with her five years into the apocalypse scenario as her lover and protector. This was not the case in the book. No, Malorie was stumbling around blind in the world raising two babies by herself and training them to listen to the world around them on her own for four years. That’s a pretty badass leading lady if you ask me.

This chick was by herself, lonely, hurt, and barely surviving all the while taking care of two infants and facing down the dangers in the world around her. She was forced to bury all of her friends behind the house she was in alone and blindfolded. She was able to make the house safe again for herself and the children despite the fact that, unlike in the movie, Gary (our human villain responsible for the death of all of Malorie’s housemates) did not die. She sets up her own alarm systems, paints the car windows and forages for supplies by herself. ON TOP OF THAT, Rick at the safe haven she was traveling to contacted her literally the day she gave birth to the Boy. She managed to find this place again after four years of waiting for the courage to make such a trip.

Now, I don’t want to sit here and continue to give away precious gems that can be found in reading the book, but I am going to urge you all to make sure that you take the time to read it. The movie captured the essence beautifully but as always there is more to know! For instance: What really happened to the group? Are those who can see the creatures mentally unstable? There was a dog *gasp* etc.

The only question that was not answered for me was what in the world do the so called creatures look like? It’s just as well, I suppose. The characters couldn’t see them without going mad. Use your imaginations! Run wild!

Overall Rating: ★★★★

That’s all for now, folks. Signing off to bring in the New Year. Be safe out there and have a wonderful holiday!

Thanks for reading.

Note: If the links for the movie or book does not work, a quick internet search on GOOGLE should take you right to them!